Alexia Eden (FairyTales Don't Exist)(4)

By: Sophie Summers

It wasn’t that I was an emo, a punk or whatever you wanna call it, I just felt that the darker the clothes the more I would be able to hide in the shadows and not be noticed. In the beginning I held my two best friends close but they could never understand what I was going through or what I was dealing with at home and after I changed, they changed.

My focus was on school and achieving good enough grades so that I could get a full scholarship to college in order for me to get the hell out of here. Dad left me money but I would only be able to use it once I turned twenty one, so if I wanted to get into a good college I had to focus on getting a scholarship. I also tried to keep myself busy and focused so that my mind wouldn’t drift to the shit I was going through at home. I didn’t have time for boys, I didn’t want what my mother had, and I never wanted to go through losing someone you love and having to deal with the aftermath like she did. In order for me to avoid any future hurt I forced myself to stay away from anything and anyone that I could become emotionally attached to and ultimately never loving anyone other the only person I had left, my mother.

Still looking at a photo of my two best friends Annie, Jenny and I at the beach with our big sunnies on, I remember the polka dot pink and white bikini. I looked so happy in the photo, not a care in the world and even though we weren’t blood related, those two girls were my sisters. Little did I know that when I decided to change my appearance or focus on school, they would be the first ones to start rumors and pass comments about me to the entire High School. Just because I didn’t fit their high standards and wasn’t part of the “Barbie Clique” I was cast a misfit.

“Well fuck you guys…” I whisper as I throw the frame into the trash can near my drawers, I notice my mom leaning on the door frame looking at me.

“Hey! What’s wrong with that photo? It’s one of my favorites, you looked so pretty.” she says picking up the frame from the bin.

“Yeah well, you can keep it I don’t want it, you can have these too if you want.” I say handing all my other frames to her that holds photos of the happy girl I once was. She doesn’t say a word but shrugs and walks out my room with them.

After unpacking, cleaning my room and the bathroom to my standard – meaning spotless, I take a shower and get dressed. Walking back to my room I hear chatter in the kitchen so I head out to see who’s here.

“Oh my! Georgie! This can’t be Lexi!” she says looking at my mother and pointing to me.

“She is gorgeous! You’ve grown up so much since the last time I saw you!” A skinny lady with slightly yellow hair, I’m guessing it’s supposed to be blond, runs towards me and gives me a hug.

Not sure whether to take the part where she says “this can’t be” as a compliment or an insult, because I certainly don’t know what the fuck she meant. Shrugging her off of me and raising my brow as I internally say what the f…

“Hun, it’s so nice to meet you, mom here has been telling me all about you, I can’t get over how beautiful you are. I’m Amber, your mom’s friend from back in the day. I’m so happy you guys are staying so close to me – I’m a few houses down, you have to meet my niece I’m sure you guys will get along since you’re both around the same age!” She rambles on chattily as if I’m her long lost sister and pats my hand as she talks. She offers me some wine from the bottle that they both have been drinking from, but I decline – there has to be at least one responsible person in this damn house.

“Georgina, have you seen my bag of clothes? I’m missing most of my shirts and jeans?” I say after going to check the car if anything was left in there but she stops me shortly with her reply.

“Oh honey that’s because I left them behind, you need to stop wearing those crappy clothes, you can wear some of mine since we’re about the same size and as soon as I get paid we can go shopping and get you some new clothes that AREN’T black!” she says this with a wave of the hand as if it’s no big deal which has me internally screaming and I’m pretty sure if this was a cartoon steam would be coming from my ears around about now but I close my eyes , roll my shoulders and take a deep breath, letting the anger fade but I can feel her watching me, waiting for an outburst and if I stand here one more minute in her presence I’ll give her exactly that.

“Seriously whatever, I don’t even have the energy to fucking argue with you right now, I need some fresh air ...” I say walking off putting my flip flops on as I go. Wandering off the patio in the back I hear Amber yelling after me.

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